WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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