All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize