Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
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