we have officially lost it.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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