Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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