So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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