Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize