We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
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