I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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