but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
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Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
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Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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