my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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