i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
me + whiskey = a bad person
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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