i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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