careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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