hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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