he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
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Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
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How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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