well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize