So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
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