he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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