the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize