if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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