I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
we're so committed to being not committed
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