you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
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