Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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