I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Randomize