Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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