I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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