Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
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