im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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