4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
He kissed a someone with a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize