Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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