Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize