she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
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How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
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Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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