Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
they're like a gay fantastic four
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
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