You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
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I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
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she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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