lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Randomize