Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I am mentally ready for anal.
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