I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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