I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
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do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
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