At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
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He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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