Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize