Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
They took my balls.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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