id be glad to
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize