She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
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