Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize