there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
So many bounce houses so little time
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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