Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize