It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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