porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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