About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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